Conversations with StrokeLine – Setten Stephenson episode four

StrokeLine’s Physiotherapist, Kath Yong, talks with Setten Stephenson.

In this episode they cover topics including accessible travel and getting back to hobbies and interests.

To watch all the series click here.

Transcript:

Kathrine Young:
I was just also going to say about your travel as well. So, you did some travel. I can't remember where, but recently, wasn't it in a blog that you mentioned?

Setten Stephenson:
Again, it comes down to confidence.

Setten Stephenson:
I've lost a lot of confidence.

Kathrine Young:
I got that sense in the blog.

Setten Stephenson:
Yeah. So people around me are going, "Well, our life hasn't stopped, so yours shouldn't stop. We understand why, but let's see if we can make things a little easier, and try something out of the ordinary." So, that travel was to Mudgee. It was just a small trip. It took about six hours. One district. Cheese, lots of cheese.

Kathrine Young:
Yeah, nice.

Setten Stephenson:
And it was three, I think, what, two nights, three nights in, I guess, an Airbnb. And that's where it started. And we thought, "Okay, look, I mean, I'm with good, good people that I know very well, that can assist me if I need it. Let's just do it."

Kathrine Young:
Yes.

Setten Stephenson:
So, we went there, and the house was so easy. I used a walking stick to get around it. The beds were all set up perfectly. The showers were perfect. We were across the road from restaurants and coffee shops.

Setten Stephenson:
I guess, being a country town, there are obstacles. The council decided to dig up the walkway.

Kathrine Young:
Oh, gosh.

Setten Stephenson:
Without negotiating with me first.

Kathrine Young:
Yeah. You sure it wasn't your Neuro physio?

Setten Stephenson:
No. My physio could've just gone, you know... No. But I got around it.

Setten Stephenson:
People were nice, they held up the traffic for them or whatever. It was very easy. The easier it is, the confidence level goes up.

Kathrine Young:
Yeah. Okay.

Setten Stephenson:
You know, after the trip, I just thought, "That wasn't hard." I can probably ramp it up next time.

Kathrine Young:
Nice. Yeah.

Setten Stephenson:
And then that's when the houseboat, for example... I said to Law, book the houseboat.

Kathrine Young:
It was after.

Setten Stephenson:
I was worried sick about what it would look like. Was I going to have to walk around permanently with a life jacket? But it was on a nice, flat... I mean, we live up near Hawkesbury River, and it was nice and flat. We found an anchor. It was just great.

Kathrine Young:
That's good.

Setten Stephenson:
Food preparation was done. It just was so easy. So I guess, again, I don't know how you build up from that, and I guess it's all affordability as well.

Setten Stephenson:
Yes, you can talk about cruises. Yes, you can talk about plane trips, although I don't know about it now.

Kathrine Young:
I know.

Setten Stephenson:
What does it look like? I have no idea.

Setten Stephenson:
So I think my next one, if there is going to be a goal, when I get my license, we'll go camping.

Kathrine Young:
Ah, so nice.

Setten Stephenson:
Yeah. So, again, we've got a certain place at... And that's rare, you know. My anxiety takes over and goes, "What about toiletry? What about [inaudible 00:03:27]? What about this?"

Kathrine Young:
It makes you think about, yeah.

Setten Stephenson:
Yeah. So I've just got to get over that and work through it.

Setten Stephenson:
I think, from the houseboat, if you don't shower in one night, it's no great loss. You know, so what.

Kathrine Young:
True.

Setten Stephenson:
Go for a swim.

Setten Stephenson:
But, you know, and I think I've just got to get that through... Because you become so, I guess, institutionalized, or in a bubble.

Kathrine Young:
Yes. Yeah, sure.

Setten Stephenson:
You know, you're used to routine.

Setten Stephenson:
So every night, I have a shower. Every morning and now afternoon, I brush my teeth. I go to bed at a certain time. I do this. You know?

Setten Stephenson:
Routine is broken when you go traveling, or camping, or whatever. So I just have to get it in my head that routine being broken is not a bad thing for a week or a weekend.

Kathrine Young:
Yes. Yes. Great.

Setten Stephenson:
And again, that's a coping mechanism that I've got to break.

Setten Stephenson:
And I think, again, a lot of people out there, they get into a routine and a habit, and especially a lot of elderly people. I mean, I'm looking at my parents and they've got a routine and, God forbid if you break it.

Kathrine Young:
To break... yeah, to break routine.

Setten Stephenson:
It's really strange. And, I guess, my family, again, I have to break it. I have to, kind of, bring things new to the table, and I guess that's quite difficult.

Setten Stephenson:
But, at the moment, it seems to work.

Kathrine Young:
That's great. Yeah. Gosh. Yeah, that's really good.

Setten Stephenson:
So, I don't know how... I mean, again, I'll update you on how the camping will go.

Kathrine Young:
Let us know.

Setten Stephenson:
But I think that... Another thing, my son wants to take me on a boat, like a little boat trip.

Setten Stephenson:
Again, it's uncomfortable to tinker for a couple of hours fishing, whatever it is.

Setten Stephenson:
Don't know what that looks like. So that is another chip I have to, well, chip away at.

Setten Stephenson:
I guess, again, I just have to work myself up to that, but not overthink of it. There is another saying which the Neuro's love to tell you, it's, "Analyze, or you paralyze."

Setten Stephenson:
So if you overanalyze something, it paralyzes you.

Kathrine Young:
Yeah, true.

Setten Stephenson:
And, basically, you stop and you think, "Okay, what can all the bad things happen?", and you don't do it.

Kathrine Young:
Yes, I love that. It's... Yeah.

Setten Stephenson:
The next thing is just do it.

Setten Stephenson:
Take it. My kids have got a saying, "Just send it", and I don't like it, because it's like... I like to think things through, which is bad.

Kathrine Young:
Yeah, me too. Yeah, sure.

Setten Stephenson:
But they just go, "Well, no, if you think about it you're not going to do it, or if you don't just do it then, you're not going to learn by it."

Setten Stephenson:
So I think, somewhere in between, if there is an [inaudible 00:06:35].

Kathrine Young:
There's like a middle ground.

Setten Stephenson:
Or a middle ground. I'm happy with a middle ground, but it doesn't always work that way.

.
Setten Stephenson:
So I think just send it, hop on a beer, whatever it is. I just have to do it.

Setten Stephenson:
Again, without the risk component.

Setten Stephenson:
So, calculated risk.

Kathrine Young:
Calculated risk. Ah, great words, Setten.

Setten Stephenson:
Thank you, thank you.

Setten Stephenson:
So, I mean, is there... what other topics... there are... I guess the big takeout is that you have to just keep living life.

Setten Stephenson:
Life is there to be enjoyed, and with a young stroke person there's a lot of it.

Setten Stephenson:
And even with an older stroke person, you can't just stop.

Setten Stephenson:
Because I think that's the demise.

Setten Stephenson:
I mean, it is very difficult to get out of the bed in the morning, get with your routine, but you just have to do it.

Setten Stephenson:
And I mean, yes, goal setting is great. Although, goal setting can be a little bit, I guess, debilitating, in that it creates anxiety, frustration, annoyance if you don't meet them.

Kathrine Young:
If you don't meet the goal, yes.

Setten Stephenson:
I get that, but on the other hand, they're great to have.

Setten Stephenson:
And I think what... well, I especially, always forget, is time is... I don't know what time's about. I want it done tomorrow.

Setten Stephenson:
But year, two years, I'm getting used to that now.

Setten Stephenson:
So it's like, I've just got to sit back and go, "If I keep going at this, if I do it a thousand times, I'll get there."

Setten Stephenson:
But it won't be tomorrow.

Setten Stephenson:
And, I guess, I've got to get that in my head. A lot of other people that I've met have got to get that in their head as well, because they always think that, "I want this fixed today."

Kathrine Young:
Yes. Yeah, okay.

Setten Stephenson:
I think... the other... I mean, I'm fairly lucky, I've got a very low pain threshold. High pain threshold? Sounds better.

Setten Stephenson:
Which means I can really push through a little bit of the pain barrier. Because pain is a bit of a pain in the neck, it makes you want to do nothing. So, even now, I mean, with me moving around or whatever, or wanting to move around, the zinging, the neuro pain is really setting in.

Setten Stephenson:
So I've got to quickly do something.

Setten Stephenson:
To counteract it.

Kathrine Young:
Okay.

Setten Stephenson:
But yeah. But I guess everyone feels this way. Like normal... Even my wife goes, "I feel pain. I feel like I don't want to do anything." So I've got to learn to push through it as well.

Setten Stephenson:
You just have to be very conscious of it, and push through a lot more pain. As I say, everything's exaggerated, so.

Kathrine Young:
Yes, true.

Setten Stephenson:
But no, it is, it's getting there, and the more blogs I can put out to you guys-

Kathrine Young:
Yeah. I love those blogs. They're great.

Setten Stephenson:
I think what I'm going to try and do is maybe put out to everyone, saying, "If there's a topic out there and you want me to talk about it."

Kathrine Young:
Yeah, that would be great. Yeah.

Setten Stephenson:
Because there's a lot of topics out there that I'm sure are top of mind, but maybe haven't been broached. I don't know.

Kathrine Young:
Yes, true. True.

Setten Stephenson:
But I might put out a feeler and see what you guys say.

Kathrine Young:
Definitely. Sounds good, Setten. And yeah, so good talking to you today. It's been great.

Setten Stephenson:
Thank you for the opportunity to talk.

Setten Stephenson:
I kind of like talking, as you probably heard.

Kathrine Young:
It's great.

Setten Stephenson:
Not a lot of people... And the dogs don't answer back, so, you know.

Kathrine Young:
Yeah. Thank you for joining us Setten.