No comparisons

Nina Wilde
Nina Wildeon Thursday, January 25 2018
8 Comments

Hi everyone,

 

I thought I would write tonight about comparisons and how I avoided being compared or comparing myself to others throughout the last 25 years.

 

This at times wasn't easy and I may have appeared like I didn't want to join in conversations, I avoided conversations that compared, judged or where I felt disrespected.

 

Knowing this I find responding to other's call out's or questions in their own stroke journey to really focus on - this is what I did, however this may not be what you need.  Allowing ownership of a person's feelings and experience.  I just wanted to own my own stuff and learn what worked for me. The uniqueness of us all is to be celebrated!

 

Hanging onto  Sue prior stroke was so important to me! My ethics and values amidst emotional confusion of where I was at, which left me reeling with despair. 

 

Then enter the world of motherhood and parenting. Competition and comparison again! I dug my heals in and would not be drawn into debates, comparisons. Even when it was so clear that at times people wanted me to do this. 

 

Be free to be who we are.

 

Sue

 

 

8 Responses
Mahila avatar
Mahila

Comparisons....I realised very early after the stroke that comparing the pre-strokeself to what I was post-stroke could only end up my becoming an emotional mess. Not pleasant at all. Instead I had to learn how to compare myself at any given time in my stroke journey to what I was like in the days immediately after the stroke and celebrate the milestones and successes. Comparing myself with other survivors didn't feel rright to  me either as no two strokes are the same. So I have however hard, kept myself from doing this. Having said that I like to learn what has worked for others in their recovery, may or may not work for me. On the same note I am open to sharing my experience if it can help other survivors - let's say I'm open to comparing notes. Have always consulted my Dr- the rehab specialist or my OT or PT or EP before trying any strategy that's worked for someone else. Well said Sue, Be free to be who we are.

Nina Wilde avatar
Nina Wilde

Hi Mahlia

 

In your comment you mention EP - what is this?

 

And this self directed tool that EnableMe is provides a safe space for people to investigate what they need to when they need to.

So valuable!

Sue

 

 

Mahila avatar
Mahila

Hi Sue,

EP  I believe is what ExcercisebPhysiologists call,themselves. They are basically PTs with slightly different uni degrees. My NDIS plan is plan-managed and the managing company put me onto an EP to work on improving the strength of my affected lowernlimb and gait as well.You are absolutely right about EnableMe. A safe space for people to investigate what they need to,do and when. To me, it has been a God-sent. Cheers

Michael R avatar
Michael R

Signs along the road... overlooked/ignored - that's how I call it

lifestyle, overweight, job, stress, chasing...what? high blood pressure, no time to stay fit, missing out on kids growing up, family history of high blood pressure, an aunt dying from stroke 7 mths pregnant

I just kept going and going until that afternoon in July 2016...

Nina Wilde avatar
Nina Wilde

Hi Michael,

 

Your honesty about what led you here is so valuable to others.  Your willingness to share and own your stroke.

 

Hi Toni,

That's great to hear of your NDIS plan including EP, 

 

Thanks heaps!

Sue

Nina Wilde avatar
Nina Wilde

Whoops I should have written Hi Mahila, not Hi Toni. Sorry!

 

Mahila avatar
Mahila

Hi Sue,

EP's charge the same as PTs according to my understanding. Yes, I am happy too that I can have the help I need through NDIS using for lower limb strengthening andbgait re-training. 

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