Getting back to myself again
My name is Leesa and 6 weeks ago I had a haemorrhagic stroke - coming to terms with accepting this is still challenging. I was at work when I was hit with the "thunderclap" headache they refer to and fortunately my work colleagues realised it was serious and phoned the ambulance and I was given the emergency care I needed very quickly. On paper I wasn't in the high risk category - I am 53, non smoker, didn't suffer high blood pressure, normal weight range etc and at this stage there are still no real answers why this happened. Maybe a weakness there in my head , surge of blood pressure ? or just "one of those things"? This is worrying in itself and fretting over it I know is counter productive in may ways.
I have been incredibly fortunate in that I have no real residual effects from the stroke as far as mobility, sight and speech and have been able to slowly return to work and building up my days. The biggest struggle is the lack of confidence and the anxiousness I feel after such a traumatic experience. The fear of it happening again, particularly when its not clear how or why it happened in the first place. I just want to be able to get back to myself again and feel like I used to - I understand this will take time. I wasn't allowed to drive for six weeks and only these last few days have been able to - that alone gives me some independence. I have always been very independent most of my adult life. I am so out of my comfort zone and hope as life becomes more normal with the support of my friends, family and gp I will feel like me again. I welcome the opportunity of this forum and its good to know I am not alone in the way I feel right now.
