18 years on and I am still healing.
18 years today I suffered my first stroke and then a second stroke four days later. Both were located each side of my cerebellum base - I believe they were Haemorrhagic Strokes.
I have worked hard over the years setting many small goals in an aim to reach my bigger ones. I have done a lot of things, and tried hard to stay motivated. I have achieved much over this time and feel like I have come so far. When I look back I realise how slow recovery is – like a snail – but this how it is. I always knew my recovery was going to take a long, long time.
My first year was spent in The Geriatric Rehabilitation Services at the Cairns Base Hospital, I thought that if they can help ninety-five year olds then I must have a chance at fifty years young!
It took a very long time to walk, and I had problems speaking, I could only say one word at a time, and it took me three years to be able to say even a small sentence.
Eighteen years on I have volunteered, was an ambassador for Leukaemia and in the RFDS Spirit of Queensland and
Secretary for Cairns Tourism Awards in Excellence for Customer Service - all this has helped me to keep my depression at bay.
At the moment I am back on a Rights in Action management committee which advocates for people who are vulnerable with disabilities. This is marvellous as I use my work as my own ‘brain games’ session. Learning how to collate, filing, using photocopying and many other tasks, work my brain.
I have found volunteering huge in my recovery. It has been a boon for me, and has become vital in my recovery as it keeps depression at bay, and keeps me MOVING. Which has helped my confidence and to not feel isolated.
I have made sure that I never ask ‘why me’ – at least not often, and I do not feel sorry for myself, which is important to me as I recognise many other people are worse off.
I am still getting better, I know my resistance is not the same, and a lot things I cannot do. I know my brain says I can but my body says no!
I realise that I will never be able to jump puddles, and I don’t need to as I have fun splashing in them. I give life an extra try because none of us know what is around the corner. I like it that way - thank goodness I like surprises. Some tasks I have to do over and over to get right, it might take a week, a month or a year, and I’ll keep trying.
In this phase of my recovery my motivation is to help others, I want to share what I have learned over the last 18 years. It gives my life meaning, and motivates me to keep improving too.
I now get to look after husband whose health is not the best, and I have a family who loves me. I give credit and thanks to the many (many) people who’ve helped me get to where I am today. I am very thankful, that I have roof over my head and a belly full of food. I may not have much in money but I am rich in many other ways – I am happy.
