Hi Tink,
Here are some comments from the community for you too.
Pip Hicks
Tink- I don’t think I have ever accepted myself since….. mine was five years ago. But I think that’s what driven me into improving so much ….so well. Everything in the beginning was done on a very small scale because I could only do very small tasks. My list of tasks have extended ... So believe it when I say -you just don’t know how well you will get unless you keep trying keep trying keep trying!
Love and thoughts to you you will get there especially and only if you keep trying!
Karen Michelle
Tink, I would say this...
Emotional responses to stroke range from suicidal at one end of the spectrum, through clinical depression and anxiety, to grieving. Only you, your loved ones and your doctor can decide where on that continuum you fall.
I went through a stage where I wanted my affected arm amputated. In no way would I say I required clinical psychological interventions. I would say it was a completely rational response in a situation where my arm was useless, painful and in the way. But medical and psych support is available and helpful to many.
The article below helped me understand my grieving. Other things that helped me were:
- Connecting with peer support; face to face and/or online
- Doing things I enjoyed that reconnected me with myself - gardening, craft, cooking, yoga; whatever meditative things make you happy
- Breaking my goals down into very small, achievable parts. An OT supported me in doing this.
- Practicing gratefulness. There's many good articles and videos on this.
- Helping others. Volunteering for stroke organisations as well as in non-stroke aspects of my life.
Remember, every day you wake up and haven't died is an awesome day! You're a long time dead so don't waste too much self indulgent energy in the less helpful stages of grieving. Do the things you enjoy, with the people you love and find the silver lining. You have a choice about how long it takes you to move from sadness, anger and frustration to peaceful acceptance. Grief counselling may help if you find the person that is a good fit for you.
http://www.tbiguide.com/emotionalstages.html
Tom Hilton
I had a really hard time getting my head around why I couldn’t do things. I had amazing support but also had to push very hard. Some days I felt like I was going nowhere. I would wake up tell my self new day, new start. Things like my motor skills to walk slowly starting coming back, same with my motor skills in my hands, but needed constant repetitive therapy. Keep strong, keep pushing, small steps are huge steps and every day is a fresh start.
Duncan Mitchell
I found keeping a journal daily helped,even just setting that as a daily activity started to build a routine, also going for a daily walk helped with my physical and mental rehabilitation. Just do what you can, don’t push too hard too soon!
Skye Lacey
My brother has embraced his “new” life. He likes to stop and smell the flowers, likes the breeze in his face, and feels grateful he is still alive š
Diane Waroux
I found small steps ahead was good for me
Melissa Tatterson
As horrible and hard as it sounds, tiny baby steps are where to start. Start step 1, then move on to step 1, part A. Move all the way through step 1 to part Z, then start step 2.
Recovery is almost always overwhelming, but even the fact you are asking for help is a step in the right direction.š¤š»
Cherie Birch
I suffered from it, but it was brief, when I am tired I do revert back. I used my sons DS game console to help me and my family did too. In relation to food I have a multi cooker, so it is a pressure cooker and slow cooker. It cooks slow or fast and helps make the meat fall apart so chewing isn't difficult. It was my lifesaver and still is on days I am fatigue and can't do much at all. There are great groups on fb with recipe ideas. Best of luck for even the small steps. š
Yana Jade
My stroke was 10 week ago and I’m still trying to find my new normal. It’s hard going from working full time with three small children, to feeling useless and like you’re doing literally nothing but you want to do everything but you’re physically unable to. I’m getting better at listening to my body and resting. The fatigue is probably the hardest to manage for me. I found the more I was able to communicate my struggles to my husband, the more he understood what I was going through and help.
Narelle Huett
My Dad had strokes and has Aphasia. Had speech therapy for quite a while and it has dramatically improved his speech. It's a tough ride for anyone. He had cards which he could show people what he wanted eg drink, eat, toilet. He can sing beautifully at church but still stumbles with speech. He gets very tired which makes his speak worse so you need to look after yourself and take each day as it comes. Don't do too much at a time. He did rehab and had hydrotherapy pool, physio, speech therapy and occupational therapist who were all fantastic with him. He is now 86. Best wishes
Anthony Craze
I had my stroke 12 months ago, I had problems with reading, writing, spelling and constructing sentences and I'm still struggling with aphasia which is a constant battle. My brain says one thing and my mouth says another! My speech therapist encouraged me to set goals for myself. I've completed most of them including back to driving but the aphasia is ongoing. Most people understand and I've learned a lot about myself and the mindset you have to have. Don't give up Tink! Keep trying and you will get there!
Jubithia Twain
A lady stopped me on my today asking what happened to my leg as "I was do young" Then she asked will it get better. I told her as it was 25 years ago, I doubted it.
I still try and hope.
Brent Pollard
Once I realised I could do most things, they just take longer. Don’t stress and try to push through or you’ll suffer the next day. Take a rest and be kind to yourself. Once you accept it instead of fighting it your outlook will change for the better.
Cheryl Wilkie
One day at a time, you can do this.
thank you so much where do I start ohh so many hugs and more hugs to all the support I have got over this post im not to good at using this group yet and understand all what everything means I just wanted to reach out and let you know It means so much to my heart and soul thst I have so many people similar or just like me and who really care I can't describe how it makes me feel thank you